25 Insane Reasons Why Kids Don't Like Certain Colleges

Here are some of the ridiculous reasons that kids dismiss some excellent colleges:

1. Dislike of archways

2. No Chipotle within walking distance

3. "I don't know anyone there."

4. "I know too many people there."

5. Aversion to tour guides' footwear (five-toed multiport sneakers) or headwear (Sherpa cap)

6. Tour guide too smug ("In my spare time I'm a midwife, and since returning from Uganda, I've started an NGO that installs solar panels in orphanages.")

7. Annoying bell tower

8. Too many Harry Potter references during info session

9. Not enough/too many vegan options in dining hall

10. Aversion to architecture: too Georgian, too Gothic, too Taco Bell

11. Too many mentions of how Oceanography course changed tour guide's life

12. Tour guide's resemblance to Justin Bieber

13. Too many homeless people

14. Professors look like homeless people

15. Aversion to upstate NY ("Upstate NY is for camp, not college")

16. Tour guide's repeated mention of a cappella groups and/or squirrel clubs

17. Rain

18. Woodland creatures: deer, raccoons, skunks

19. Aversion to school colors

20. Townies reminiscent of characters in "Deliverance," "Big Love," or "Jersey Shore"

21. Mean parking attendant

22. Long line for the ellipticals at the gym

23. Lame Latin words in school motto

24. Emma Watson transferred out

25. School is parents' first choice

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